Hopeless (Hopeless, #1) (2024)

Hopeless - Having no hope, bleak, despairing....isn't that what it means to be hopeless??...But I learnt a different meaning of Hopeless recently....that sometimes being hopeless can mean so much more....

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Someone told me I was hopeless....
That I would never go anywhere in my life
That I would have to struggle to survive
That people would point their fingers at me and whisper behind my back
Someone told me I was hopeless....
And I just smiled and nodded and told her that I hoped that's how it always will be....Me living Hopelessly....

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I read something called Hopeless...
I wondered what it was all about
I wasn't prepared for the hurricane of emotions that it would bring around...

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It's a story about a girl who lives in a technology free world
It's a story about how she meets a guy who is the only one to make her feel something other than numb (she has hot flashes and butterflies on seeing him... ;) )
It's a story about Sky who finds her stars and butterflies in Holder
It's a story about how when they go on a date innocently playing Dinner Quest unaware that soon they'll embark on a life quest which will change everything...
It's a story about a girl who loses herself in order to find herself
It's a story about a boy who never leaves her side because he's been waiting for her his whole life...
It's a story about devastation
It's a story about loss
It's a story about desolation
It's a story about love
It's a story about life
It's a story about HOPE

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And it's a story I fell in love with.....

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I fell in love with a woman who had everything of hers torn apart...
She had thought she had escaped it all till a voice, an innocent voice made her look around..
She prepared to battle to save someone she didn't know yet she did, perhaps better than anyone else..
I fell in love with a woman who gave up everything so that she cold bring life into someone's heart...into someone's eyes..

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I fell in love with a hopeless boy, man-boy, guy, whatever you call him...who stole my breath away...
I fell in love with a hopeless boy who thought over words too much...
He was searching for something his whole life and had no idea he was so close the entire time....
He was so passionate about life, love and everything else...
I fell in love with with a hopeless boy who made wordless pinky promises and gazed at stars and looked after Sky and was intense about everything and had me in his spell....

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I fell in love with a hot pink guy...
He was Mormon and gay....
He was also one of the straightest person I've met and isn't that what we all what in our very bestest friend ever in the whole wide world??..
I fell in love with a guy who wanted to conquer the public school....he had formed a smart alliance and he was nobody's fool... ;)

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I fell in love with a girl who loved sugar.....
She was just like me when it came to reading, romance, lol, WTF, OMG, all the lame stuff....
She was as clueless about technology as I had been two years before....(I still am sometimes).. ;)
She had so many things inside her waiting to come out....
So she did everything to make herself numb....
She hadn't prepared herself for someone who would hold her...
She hadn't been prepared for all the stuff that he told her...
She was one of the strongest person I've ever met...
I fell in love with a girl who stood up, dusted herself, and moved on when life pushed her and she fell...

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I read something called HOPELESS...
I had no idea I would learn so much...
So, here only few of the many things that I learnt and loved so much...

I learnt that it's alright to feel and to feel as much or anything I want
And so I felt....I felt so damn much...
I felt love when he held her hand
I felt anger when he hurt her so bad...
I felt horror when I knew what was about to come...
I felt sadness at all that he had done
I felt laughter coming out of me when her friends were being lovely and silly and when she sent the wrong text, when she blurted out stuff randomly, and at so many other things...
I felt happiness pouring out of me when she wasn't numb and lonely...
I felt tears running down my cheeks when I cried...you know the type when one tear hasn't even rolled down your cheeks before another one is slipping out of your eyes??...I cried that type of cry when I read everything...
I felt my heart breaking when he cried holding her, when she died a little everytime inside...

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I learnt that sometimes it's better not to rush and to just do that thing which lies in between like and love in the dictionary...you know that thing which is a combination of like and love??
LIVE....
So, I lived this and did not rush it....because love was inevitable but the journey to love through simply living???...oh it was beautiful...so heartbreakingly beautiful....

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I learnt that in life you need and can take chapter breaks too...
When you read a book and don't like something you can skip it, go to the part which you do like or even leave the whole thing unfinished...
Life...life cannot be divided into chapters but what to do when everything overwhelms you....when it seems everything is rushing at you....when you can't seem to catch a breath....????
You take a chapter break, from everything.....from your life...
And then take a deep breath and dive right back in....

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I learnt that sometimes when you feel disconnected and numb inside
All you have to do is close your eyes and talk....and say all the right things, all the things inside you that you've kept locked up for so long to that part of you which doesn't feel anymore, which is slipping away....
All you have to do is close your eyes and reach out to yourself, extend your hand and hold that part of yourself tight....so tight that there's nothing left in it except love, sunshine and hope....

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I learnt that sometimes the most simple questions are the ones that are most difficult to answer in life....
"What do you want?"
"Will you be okay?"....

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I learnt that sometimes in life there are no right choices...
Sometimes you just have to choose between a bunch of wrong choices and pick the one which feels the least wrong...

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I learnt that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger
That the pain, the hurdles, the things that knock you down in life are tests...
That when life punches you in the face....you don't cower...
You simply pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and stand taller than before, stronger than before...

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I learnt that it isn't the firsts that are so important...
It's the forevers that matter the most..

That one shouldn't look for a happily ever after...
But rather make your today into one...

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"Thank you for giving me the courage to always ask the questions, even when I don’t want the answers. Thank you for loving me like you do. Thank you for showing me that we don’t always have to be strong to be there for each other—that it’s okay to be weak, so long as we’re there."

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I read something called Hopeless...
I loved that it had Hope
I loved that it had Les
I loved that it had Karen and Six/Seven
I loved that it had Breckin
I loved that it had Holder
I loved that it had Holder(because he deserves to be mentioned way more than just once)
I loved that it had Sky...
I loved that it too had butterflies...but in a different way.. :)
I loved that it had no point of retreats...because if it did, then it wouldn't be what it is...
I loved that it had stars....and they just about broke my heart..
I loved that it had the best first kiss in the history of first kisses—without even kissing ;)
I loved that it made me feel...
I loved that it took my breath away...
I love that it made me reel...
I loved that it had live....
I loved that it had star gazing..
I loved that it had pinky holding...
I loved that it had so many other things...

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“The sky is always beautiful. Even when it’s dark or rainy or cloudy, it’s still beautiful to look at. It’s my favorite thing because I know if I ever get lost or lonely or scared, I just have to look up and it’ll be there no matter what...and I know it’ll always be beautiful.

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Like, live, and love Hopeless
Not because it has life in it (but it does)
Not because it has love in it (but it does)
Not because it has faith in it (but it does)
But because it has something way beyond life
Way beyond love
Way beyond faith
It has something which lives in all of us, no matter what life gives us...

It has HOPE in it.....

“I’ve lost a lot in my long life.
Yes, I’ve seen pain and I’ve seen strife.
But I’ll never give up; I’ll never let go.
Because I’ll always have my ray of hope.”

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Someone told me that I would never reach the stars....never touch the sky...
Someone told me that I was hopeless...
And I just smiled and nodded my head because I know that if there's one thing in life you can never have less of....it's HOPE.....
I'm a dreamer...I'm a star gazer...I wish upon the stars every night....
And I hope that's how it'll always be.....
Me living Hope-less(ly).....

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Promise that you'll never ever let go.....

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To love means loving the unlovable. To forgive means pardoning the unpardonable. Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.

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It's a story to which I would give 76 shining stars if I could.....
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Hopeless (Hopeless, #1) (2024)
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